So, I changed up the colors a little bit. I know next to nothing about HTML, but I am learning little bits and pieces as I fiddle around with this junk. Like the little thing in the previous entry, that was a putrid color before I messed with it. I want a fancy blog! *cries*

My children made me cry today. Not an exasperated or overwhelmed cry, but tears of utter joy and amazement. They were playing and running around the house together screaming wildly. Then, they got really quiet and I started to become suspicious and went to track them down. There they were, in the kitchen, both squeezed into the high chair like two peas in a pod, and they were feeding eachother pretzels Hollie had swiped from the counter. It made me melt. Those two are so close, it's almost like they are twins. I have never seen two kids so attached to eachother, and it's almost like they have a psychic connection sometimes. One of thier favorite things to do lately is to chant in unison. This is amazing considering Bubba doesn't talk yet, but somehow he manages to chant whatever Hollie is chanting. Yesterday it was "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!" in their little sing songy voices. I love them so much. I can't believe I could have lost them because of those nuts.

I pissed this guy off royally last night on AIM. See, I had been reading his blog for a while and the guy never freakin' updates his blog. He has like, one entry a month and it's frustrating for a blog addict like me. A friend (who shall eternally remain nameless) gave me his AIM screen name. I began to complain to him and making demands that he post at least 2 times a week in his blog or things would get ugly. This guy found no humor at all in what I was saying, even though my tone was extremely sarcastic and it was obvious I was effing of. He kinda freaked. He began IM-ing my friend, the one who gave me his name and asking if he knew me. The friend said he had no clue who I was, bua hahahahahahaha. I personally found this whole fiasco extremely amusing. This morning when I got up, he had an entire blog entry dedicated to ME! HAHAHAHAHAHA. Here it is The Prick With NO Sense of Humor's Blog
Enjoy!

I thought this was extremely hilarious.

What do people really think about you? by Raven319
Name
Age
favorite song
Parents think	You're an angel
Strangers think	You're hot
Friends think	You need a fuck buddy
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

I know, I'm slipping. The last couple entries I cheated and just posted a picture or silly quiz. I will do better I promise.
This past week has been so awesome. My kids are just being so great. I love it when they get along. Hollie keeps telling her little brother " I'M the mama!" and then she bosses him. The cute thing is, he listens. He positively adores his sister and he would do anything she told him to. This idea is a little scary to me, because I am 100% certain Hollie is going to be my wild-child and I'm sure she's going to get Bubba into all sorts of mischief. Sort of how I corrupted my very own younger sibling. I made my sister hang out with me and my friends and she smoked pot with us as young as 12 years old. That's younger than I was even. I was 14 when I first smoked pot. I feel bad about dragging my kid sister along and getting her into all sorts of trouble, but those are fond and oftentimes amusing memories and stories to tell at family get togethers. (sidenote: I no longer smoke pot if you were wondering).

I'm listening to a lot of old Outkast today. I do not know why, but it makes me happy right now. I just got done listening to ATliens. Man that was a weird CD. My musical tastes and preferences are ever-changing. I wonder if I will listen to 'oldies' when I am 40. I wonder what will be considered an 'oldie' by then. I cannot envision Britney Spears being played on an oldies station. Or Limp Bizkit or something. That would be so weird. I can't even imagine myself being 40. I am 21 and already wigging out because I have a 3 year old past week I've been switching between old school rap and death metal. With some emo thrown in for flavor. I think I may have mentioned this before, but I actualy have a playlist on my PC entitled "The I Want To Kill Myself Mix". It's a nice mix of every uber depressing song I've ever heard. I also have a "House Cleanin' " playlist which has every annoying new wave 80's song created. I want an MP3 player so bad. Maybe I can buy myself one for my birthday.

On to more pressing issues. I have become a vegetarian again. Not a vegan mind you, I still enjoy the little dairy that my lactose intolerant body can handle. I guess I can't really say I'm a vegfetarian because I adore fish and shellfish and I will NEVER ever ever give up my loveerly lemon pepper Tilapia and shrimp scampi. I haven't eaten meat in a little while now and I've been peddling the PETA website on my away messages. I'm not caught up in all the mumbo jumbo political garbage, but I do think we have plenty of food choices other than dead animals that rot in your intestines and clog your arteries. If you see me eating meat at school, or in public for that matter, please come smack me in the back of the head. It's not hard actually, because I've been addicted to those Gardenburgers for the last couple of years and recently I discovered this fake barbecue 'chicken' made from soy protein that honestly tastes JUST like real chicken. Even my children enjoy it. They never liked meat anyways. I hated that, I would have to forcefeed it to them. My kids are natural vegetarians. I would have to bribe Hollie to eat a hamburger. They are such weird kids. They love vegetables. The other night Hollie insisted she wanted corn for dinner. Just corn. I let her have it. She did end up begging for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich right before bed though.

Ok, I think this entry is quite long enough and I think I have redeemed myself for slacking off lately. I've been so busy, mostly with my thoughts about Chunk. Teehee. I am so giddy when I talk about him. I don't want my happiness to show through onto this blog thjough. I must remain a contrary and bitchy writer or my blog won't be 'cool' anymore. Ha.

And now for the things I am grateful for today....
Rain,
Soy protein,
Slobbery baby kisses,
Joy,
The Lion King Special Edition DVD.
That's all for now, Have a blessed day!

This is the wedding dress I want soooooo bad.

histrionic


Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

My little sister has this blogging habit that I am going to try to adopt. At the end of her posts she lists everything she is grateful for. It makes her long list of complaints seem less harsh and it lightens the mood a bit. I do realize I go off on long rants and that would get very annoying day after day. So this blog is going to be a list of things I am grateful for.

I am grateful for....
My Heavenly Father,
My children,
My family and friends,
CHUNK!,
The opportunity to go to college,
Being born in America,
Modern medicine,
The kindness of strangers,
Music,
Sunflowers,
Technology,
Automobiles,
Being divorced,
Being able to know what love is,
Chocolate,
My chat friends,
Kazaa Lite,
Disposable diapers,
Being able to nurse my children,
Bottled water,
Tilapia fish,
Weight Watchers,
Air conditioning,
All of my talents,
Big fluffy pillows,
Polar fleece,
Movies,
Having the time to type this,
Blogger,
Xanga,
My scriptures,
A lot of other stuff, including Pocky.

I am feeling very insightful today. Obviously there are a lot more things that I am grateful for, but I am having a hard time putting them into words. Making that list really makes me think about the fact that none of the material things matter at all. When we die, we can't take any of it with us. We can only bring our souls. I didn't go to church today, I am thinking I shoulda.

So the stupid Woodstock picture doesn't work. How lame is that. Chunk left this evening. I miss him soooo much already. I am sitting here waiting for him to call to tell me he got there ok. I have all these intrusive and paranoid thoughts about his plane crashing, or maybe he got into a car wreck outside the airport, pr maybe his parents killed him for making the crazy choice to move here. I really don't know what to think, but the sleep deprivation is probably the cause of my insanity tonight.

So, the ex-in-laws are at it again, and this time they are in fine form. The ex-mother-in-law has decided to move back to Decatur. Hooray (rolls eyes). She is the most psycho of all of them. And get this...She tells me she is moving into MY house next week. I about shat myself. She is truly a dangerous person, and I have NO desire to live near her, or even in close proximity. So I had a mini meltdown and cried a lot. Then I get this email from My ex husbands sister and it's basically to warn me that they are about to do something drastic. She says that the Grandma (the one who lives next door) seems to think she has some dirt on me that can get me arrested and have my kids taken away. I spazzed when I heard that. I don't know what to think. I haven't done anything illegal so I'm not terribly worried, but the mere fact that they are even *thinking* about doing something like that sickens me.

Chunk saves the day. We decide to get an apartment together. We go down to this apartment complex we find online, because it was super cheap and we take a look at a two bedroom. It was really nice! We loved it. So I guess as of April 9th I will be moving into the apartment...And he's going to finish out his semester in Colorado and head out here after it's over. And then....dum dum dum......We're gonna get married. Yes, I know, It's a shocker. But, we really love eachother and we both feel GREAT about starting a life together. He's my mini-me...He completes me *tear*.

I start work at Kroger on Monday morning. I am looking forward to it because I feel like I need to be more productive. School with no job just isn't working out for me. I feel like a lazy poor ass. I will be working evenings in the deli, which seems to me would be kinda cool...It's always kinda dead in there that time of day. Plus, I do love Krogers Deli sandwiches...The Turkey and Swiss on sweet bread is divine. I wonder If I can make some hella fat subs and then buy them after my shift is over. Better yet..I wonder if I get a discount! I don't know what the ex-in-laws will say once I tell them my little plan. My guess is that tomorrow we're going to have a huge blowout. I also wonder if they will take away my car. That would really suck, since I got hired at the Kroger in south shores and I am going to be living way up on Mound Rd.

Hmmmppphhh. It's 1:31 am..and I am STILL sitting up waiting for the phone call that let's me know he didn't die. It's torture I tell you....I am going to bed with the phone on my pillow. Ciao.

You are Woodstock!


Which Peanuts Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

OK, I lost the comments, and got them, back. However, what on earth are these trackback thingers. They weren't on there last time. MIKE! HELLLLLLLP ME! I also lost my music, *tear*

This is an obligatory blog day. I have to type *something* since I missed yesterday and it is unsatisfactory to me to have large gaps between entries. So there you have it. I want links on my blog darnit. Mike said If I change templates I will lose my comments box, and I am sooooo stupid, I don't know how to get them back. But I shall try. If the comments boxes are gone when you see this, never fear, I will get them back up shortly.

[ series 1 ]
Name: Kelie
Birthday: June 26th
Birthplace: Victorville, California
Current Location: Decatur, Illinois
Eye Color: Baby Poo greenish/hazel
Hair Color: Brown with black and blond stripes
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac Sign: Cancer
Font: On yahoo, comic sans, 12, red and blue alternating
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[ series 2 - your favorite ]
Music: Everything, even country AND rap.
Cartoon: Jem and the Holograms..from the 80s
Color: Yellow
Car: GTO
ICEE Flavor: What the heck is an icee, we must not have those in hicksville
Magazine: Rolling Stone
TV Show: I do not have one at the moment
Song at the Moment: Tenderloin by NOFX
Food & Beverage: Pocky, Caffeine-free Dr. Pecker
Subject in School: Speech
Weekend Activity: Sitting on my arse
Frozen Yogurt: I miss TCBY :(
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[ series 3 - what is ]
Your most overused phrase: Like, and Hella
The first thing you thought when you woke up: I'm cold.
The last image/thought you go to sleep with: Hallucinations from my brain.
The first physical feature you notice of opposite sex: Height
The best name for a Butler: Bumbley
Your idea of the wussiest Sport: LaCrosse
Your best feature: My badunkadunk
Your greatest fear: Becoming a deaf mute.
Your greatest accomplishment: Having two c sections with no pain meds after
Your most missed memory: Laying in my mom's lap while she played with my hair.
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[series 4 - you prefer]
Pepsi or Coke: Caffeine-free Pepsi
McDonald's or Burger King: McDonalds
Single or Group Dates: Single
Adidas or Nike: SKECHERS BABY!
Chicken nuggets or Chicken fingers: I'm a nugget gal
Dogs or Cats: Dogs
Monica or Brandy: Neither
Tupac or Jay-Z: Tupac
Shania Twain or LeAnn Rhymes: Either
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Neither, I don't do tea.
One pillow or Two: One, I only own one.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chiocolate
Hot chocolate or Hot cocoa: uhhhhhh
Cappucino or Coffee: Neither, a mocha with a double shot of carmel and whipped cream.
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[ series 5 - do you ]
Shower everyday: Yes.
Have a crush: I'm not a player I just crush a lot.
Think you've been in love: YES
Want to go to college: I am in college, but I don't think I want to go ever again.
Like high school: Never really went very much, therefore I cannot form an opinion on this.
Want to get married: Yes!
Type correctly: No, I neber tpye corrctely
Believe in yourself: Sometimes, expecially after large amounts of POCKY!
Have any tattoos? Where: Yes, everywhere - Mua ha ha ha.
Have any piercings? Where: I think we've gone through this before...
Get motion sickness: yes
Think you're a health freak: If you consider a hypochondriac a freak, then yes:)
Get along with your parents: Yep, great relationship with them both.
Like thunderstorms: Terrified of them!
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[ series 6 - the future ]
Age your plan to be married: Uhhh....
Number and names of children: I have 2, Hollie and Bubba...who knows if there will be more.
Where will you be at age 20: I will be last year at age 20.
Dream wedding: Gothic- mua ha ha ha.
How do you want to die: I hope someone throws a brick through my windshiled on the highway as i go under an overpass.
Dream job: Getting paid to talk a lot.
Country you'd like to visit: Iceland
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[ series 7 - opposite sex ]
Best eye color: Who cares
Best hair color: Who cares
Short or long hair: I am a sucker for a guy with long hair *sometimes* ORLANDO BLOOM IN LOTR MADE ME CREAM MY JEANS!
Best height: Taller than me
Best weight: Who cares
Best clothes: Anything metrosexual
Best first date location:Who cares
Best first kiss location: mua ha ha ha.
*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*
[ series 8 - other ]
Last time you slept with a stuffed animal: 2 nights ago. I slept with a Teddy Bear I tried to kidnap for ransom.
Rings before you answer the phone: Usually 4, I am lazy and often let the answering machine pick up.
What's on your mousepad: Fuzz...cup rings.
How many houses/apts you've lived in: 12
How many schools you've gone to: 6
Bedroom carpet color: Hardwood floor
Shave your head for $5,000?: I'd shave my head for free.
Three things you'd take if you were to be stranded on an island, not including people: CD player, CD's, LOTS of chocolate.

My sister, her husband my lil nephew Devilyn all left to go home to colorado last night at 4 am. They got in this evening at 7, and are settling back into the old routine. I am so bummed.

On a positive note, Chunk is here! For all those chatters out there who read this, I mean buitenstaander. It's his spring break and we're having a peach of a time. He's so cute. And nice, And funny. And a perfect gentlemen. *sigh*

That's all, I've got nothing.

My sister leaves tomorrow. Blah. That's all I have to say about that. Bubba Blue is feeling much better today, must have been a 24 hour bug. I made chicken nuggets for lunch and the kids are eating right now so I have a few minutes to blog.

I feel good today, despite the fact that I awoke a very cranky person. I think I should be checked for hypoglycemia because I am often a hoser when I don't eat. As soon as I powered down a couple nuggets I felt like a million bucks. I have decided to make a change in my diet again. I am not going back on weight watchers necessarily, but along those lines. I have been slipping in the sweets department and I fully blame Pocky. I wonder if I can sue them for making me fat and causing risks to my health like the guy who's suing McDonalds. I could never betray my Pocky in such a manner though, it's been so good to me.

I missed a lot of school this past week, so I am devoting this weekend to catching up on a lot of reading and writing my one act play for my intro to theatre class. I don't know if I will be here next semester, but I have already been working on new speech stuff, since I am *that* much of a geek. I have this great STE (speech to entertain) I've been writing about a woman's right to pornography. This summer I want to read 50 books and 20 plays. My goal is to become a well-read individual. I have been reading a few plays lately though, because my theatre class requires it. I think I've read about 6 plays this semester. I have read a lot of books in the past, but over the last 11 months I've slowed down to 3 books a month or so. I used to read that much a week.

That is all, the Keliemonster needs more glucose in her system in order to be a sane and responsible human being. *sighs* I am always eating...

Today my son Bubba Blue was very sick. He's had a fever all day. I have been consistently giving him tylenol and advil, and it helps a bit. He is sleeping now, the poor dear. He is such a sweet thing, and I hate to see him feeling bad. I didn't go to school again today, sore subject. I talked to my mom last night about me moving back home and maybe going to the University of Alaska and she seemed OK with the idea, but not as overly enthusiastic as I had thought she'd be. Not a lot went on today really. I made S.O.S. for dinner, it was good. Today was mostly diapers, snotty noses, fevers, sippy cups and potty training. This is going to be the shortest entry in a long time, I've got a headache and I just don't have anything else I want to say except DON'T EVER FORGET TO TAKE YOUR BIRTH CONTROL!! hehe.

I've got much to blog about today, but I will try to keep it simple. I had a job interview at Kroger today, it went very very well. I took a saliva drug test in office and she basically said I had the job, but she couldn't not officially confirm it until the test comes back in 2 days. The nose ring has to go, no ifs ands or buts. I am bummed about that. Last night my friends Ian and Bryan came over. We just BS'd and had a good time. I de-haired Ian completely with my surgi-cream spray. It's kind of like Nair but way better and less stinky. So he's a hairless rat now. Bryan is having kind of a crappy home life right now, and he just stayed over, he slept on my couch. While I was gone at my interview today, Phyllis came over with her best friend, wicked witch Diane and proceeded to have a meeting about what a horrible person I am with my sister and my friend Bryan. Then they launched on him, telling him that he is not allowed to spend the night anymore because he is a health hazard to my kids. ????????? I am confused on how he is a health hazard. He seems clean, he washes his hands and he never picks up my kids anyway. Then she went in on Carie about how I allow underage drinking parties at my house, which is COMPLETELY untrue, I don't even drink myself, and I don't allow people to drink over here. I've never even had a party here, just a couple get togethers and there was no partying going on. A few games of Uno and going to IHOP at 5 am are hardly crazy shindigs if you ask me. One person has had a few beers here with Carie and Zeb ONE time. Big whooptidoo.

Then she pulled Carie aside and said that I was just using Bryan for a piece of ass. Her exact words, "That boy in there is just a piece of ass." Carie started laughing because she thought she was joking, but soon realized she was totally serious. She seems to think that I am sleeping with every guy who comes over my house. She was basically trying to present a case to my sister that I am a bad mother. It's not the first time she's pulled a stunt like this, and each and every time we go through this I always ask her to please come to ME if she has a problem, and to not just gossip about it with the family until it gets so blown out of proportion that I blow up on her. So for the 2nd time in the last 7 months, I am wanting to leave or at least move out of *her* house so she can't control me anymore. Carie said that she kept referring to my children as "her babies" and this bothers me a lot. I don't know what to do, but I believe I have several options. I can drop out of school and work at Kroger and try to make it in an apartment here. I can move back home to Alaska. I can move back to Colorado with my sister. Almost every choice involves dropping out of school anyways, because I don't have anyone to watch my kids. I've missed 4 classes this week.

This woman controls every aspect of my life and I am sick of it. I was held prisoner by her little golden-boy grandson for 5 years of my life, and I refuse to live like this anymore. Something has to happen, and soon before I stew about this until I implode. I want to talk to Phyllis one on one, without either of us getting upset, but you just can't talk to this woman. She's always on the defense and she always talks as if you're attacking her, no matter how gently you put things. Also, she is almost never alone with me, she always brings one of her friends when we try to talk so she has back-up if I say anything she doesn't like. It's very difficult living here, and I am tired of the tension and walking on eggshells all the time. I've got to make a move. It's now or never.

I skipped class today. No babysitter again etc. Carie had a headache really bad. Last year she was diagnosed with a pseudo-tumor in her brain. It's a giant build-up of spinal fluid behind her eyes and it causes debilitating headaches. Since she has been in Illinois, she has not taken her medication once, so of course I am sure the fluid is building up again. I didn't want to leave the children with her when she was feeling like that, and of course she didn't want to watch them anyhow. It's Hollie's birthday today and I feel like the worst mom ever because I didn't buy her anything. I wish I could have but this stupid speeding ticket is worrying me and I don't want to spend my last $100 just in case I HAVE to pay it. My mom sent Hollie birthday money, and we're going to the big Dairy Queen tonight. It's really cool, it's a brand new one and it has a HUGE play area and video games and stuff. They even have computers and webcams there. I found a Chuck E. Cheese, but it's about an hour away and I don't want to force the kids to sit in the car that long. I feel like such a hick, we're goin' down yonder to the big ol' Dairy Queen tonight fellers. If anyone wants to come...We're having an impromptu birthday get together at the DQ in Mt. Zion. I am not sure what time...Probably around 4. Come one, come all.

I awoke today to my daughter about an inch from my face whispering in her hoarse paralyzed vocal cord voice, "mommy, bubba is crying, get up". She's so bossy. But she was right, my son was screaming at the top of his lungs at 6 am. So I get up and stumble around till I get to his room, and before I can even open the door, I smell it. It being the baby poo smeared everywhere. I open the door, and my son is shrunk into one corner of the crib, desperately trying to escape the green mess he made, which he now realizes is gross. So I throw them both into the bathtub and that's that.

So I have no idea what I'm going to do with my kids today. Everytime I ask my sister to watch them, she rolls her eyes and sighs all loud and acts totally inconvenienced. She never says yes, and if I really want her to watch them I have to pretty much beg her and make all kinds of deals and stuff. It's stupid. I am getting sick of this quick, considering I watch her son whenever she asks me to. I have a couple of classes today, and she agreed to watch Bubba only, but when she found out my class didn't get out until 6 pm she had a cow. I don't know whats going to happen, most likely I will end up begging and promising her things I cannot afford to buy, like cigarettes or whatever. She's always been a good sister, but very selfish. She really doesn't give a flying rats fanny if I miss class today or not, because she's never been to college, and she has no idea what it's like. She thinks because I don't work that it's a cake-walk, and I'm not doing anything. She thinks that because I really wanted her to move out here, that's it's all on me, that because her husband is having a hard time finding work here, that it's all my fault and she doesn't owe me anything. I don't expect her to owe me anything, but I am letting them stay with me for free for pete's sake, and buying their food ETC, the least she could do is help out in a tough time and watch my kids for a couple hours this week so I can make it to class. I am going to bring Hollie to school with me today, since she went to the daycare on campus before...And see if they can take her temporarily this week. Another bill I can't afford to pay.

My speeding ticket is due this month, and I am going to see if there is a way I can get the time limit extended, because I simply can't pay it and I really would rather not have a warrant. I swear I am never going to speed again. I had no idea tickets were that much, and I am going to be watching my butt on the highway from now on. I was feeling pretty complacent today, but that all went down the crapper fast. I am a big ball of stress once again, and it's all I can do to keep from screaming. I know I am going to catch tons of flack, but I've been smoking again lately. A lot. Much more then I ever did before. I've been smoking probably 4 or more cigarettes a day (stealing them from my bratty sister). I need to stop, and soon before I get hooked. Right now I just do it because I like how they make me feel, and not because of an undying need to smoke. It's purely a selfish vice right now, and I think I should nip it in the bud before it goes any further.

My wonderful children just pulled the drapes down, and I'm too short to put them back up without a chair. hehe. Darn babies. I can't wait till Hollie figures out how to open the refrigerator, and I am shocked she hasn't ever done it yet. Her 3rd birthday is tomorrow. I have nothing planned due to the circumstances. I will probably just take her to the childrens museum and let her run wild for a few hours. I like that place more than she does I think. It's too bad we don't have a Chuck E Cheese anywhere near here. That would be soooooo fun. I am going to look it up, maybe there is one in Springfield or Champaign or something. See you kiddies later.

I just had a really good phone conversation with Chuck. I think things are gonna be ok. He's still coming out for spring break and we are going to have a blast, I know it. I am looking forward to going back to school tomorrow, even though I am totally unprepared for speech team. I've worked on some stuff, but I am nowhere near the point I wanted to be at by tomorrow. I am so close to just saying screw it and better luck next year. I can't let myself do that though, I HAVE to do this, it was one of my goals for this year. I have to stick with it.

My ex-husbands grandma is super sick, she is in the hospital. She had two really bad asthma attacks yesterday and she is admitted and on oxygen. She is the one who normally watches my kids for me while I'm at school and stuff, so I'm not sure what's going to go on. I hope she gets better soon. We've all been kind of sick for the last few weeks. It's this nasty cold none of us can seem to shake off, and for Gramma, and Hollie it's even harder because of Gramma's asthma and Hollie's lung disease. The nebulizers have been running like crazy lately.

That's all I've got for today. I am pretty complacent. Hope to stay this way for a little while.

I HAVE NEVER BLOGGED IN ALL CAPS BEFORE. THIS IS CONSIDERED YELLING TO THOSE FLUENT IN CYBER-ESE. YES, I AM YELLING. WANNA KNOW WHY? BECAUSE I....HAVE.....POCKY!!!!

YES, I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT EITHER. THANKS TO MISS SANDRA WHO POSTED ON MY COMMENTS ABOUT THE POCKY AT SUNCOAST, I AM NOW THE PROUD OWNER OF REGULAR CHOCOLATE POCKY, BUT ALSO, THE EDGY AND VERY PUNK ROCK STRAWBERRY POCKY. I FULLY INTENDED TO GIVE SOME TO MY LOVELY FRIENDS WHO SHARED MY LAST POCKY EXPERIENCE WITH ME, BUT SINCE I'VE ALREADY CONSUMED OVER HALF OF IT (WITH THE HELP OF MY CHILDREN) I THINK THAT I MAY HAVE TO GO BACK AND BUY MORE. OH DARN, TWIST MY ARM.

Ok, I have a date tonight. It should be fun, haven't been on an actual date in forever. Last night my sister and I went to the mall, and I got a new bellybutton barbell. It's cute, it has sparklies and the bottom part is a rubber spikey pink flower. The mall was fun, I saw a couple extremely hot guys there, too bad I am almost 100% sure they were all gay. Dang my metrosexual addiction, it screws me everytime. You just can't tell anymore who is gay and who is merely metrosexual.

My kids are being crackheads today. I should probably get off the computer and go tend to my herd.

Oh what a night. I had my first co-ed sleepover ever. Well...I've had male roommates before when I was younger...But this was different. I'm going to change their names because a few things happened that I am not so sure they'd want broadcasted all over cyberspace. Suzie, Elijah, Leanna and Aaron all came over and we had SUCH a good, and sober time. Well, except Elijah. He had a couple beers. My sister and her husband drink, so he a couple of theirs but I don't think he was ever drunk at any point in the night. We played Uno, ate tons of candy and brownies, watched The Family Guy, downloaded a bazillion songs from Kazaa and went to IHOP at 5 am. We didn't really sleep till about 6 or 7ish but it was great. Suzie was being ultra clingy as usual all over Ian and irritating everyone present. He ended up sleeping next to her on the couch, but it was extremely innocent. Poor guy, she's got is BAD for him, but she would never admit it.

I admit it, he's a hottie. If he weren't such a baby, and so dang pretty I'd be all over that myself. I have a problem with the fact that he's prettier than me though. He's just so cute I could spit. I plucked his eyebrows last night. That was another thing we did at our little get-together. We all plucked eachothers eyebrows. I plucked Suzie's for the first time. Elijah yelped like a little baby. Suzie, surprisingly, did not flinch. Aaron is sooooooooo soooooo hot. And extremely intelligent. At school he never talks, but last night he seemed very social, and darn funny at times. At IHOP, he and Elijah were doing 'stuart' impressions, from MAD TV. Then, they were talking about the old times..And how they used to make out a lot. And I asked if Elijah had ever made out with Aaron, and he was like, "Oh hell yeah we have, he's fun to make out with." My jaw dropped, and Elijah asked if he should prove it and I just sat and stared. He said " Hey Aaron, c'mere" and he did, and then they made out!!! Tongues and all. I was in shock. I've never seen two guys kiss before, let alone two incredibly hot guys make out. I found it oddly, and disgustingly arousing. I am getting so boy crazy, and it freaks me out.

Speaking of boys I like, Chuck is pissing me off majorly. I am at the point where I don't even want to talk to him. He has a few valid points but he doesn't give me any leeway whatsoever. I think he is just needing much much more attention than I am able to give, and he's not willing to compromise on that. And that, my friends, is what angers me. So basically, he's not coming anymore, he wants to just stay on-line friends and blah blah blah, doing this a week before the big day REALLY makes me question his motives all along. We both have kind of done 180's in our intention since we met...And things have really changed a lot between us. This just gives me more proof that all men really are the same. They seem different on the outside but when you dig down deep, everyone is basically the same. If not anything else, you would think he'd just come out and have a good time just as friends, like we are right now, and just have a good time, without any expectations. But no.

I am listening to Sarah Brightman right now. I love her so much because her voice just makes me feel all floaty inside. I also love Sigur Ros for the same reason, the music is pure bliss. Last night someone downloaded a song by some group called Bright Eyes and I just love it so much. I had never heard of it before, but it's great. I really need to buy an mp3 player, or an Ipod or something. I am getting ready to fire up the ol' Kazaa lite and get a few songs as I type this. I know I need to quit before I get busted, but that just seems so far away from reality to me, considering how many people download as much stuff as I do on a daily basis. I guess I'm still in the invincible mode in my brain. My dad keeps egging me on, assuring me there is no way I can ever get in trouble, but it has happened to some people. Oh well..I'll just keep doing it. You're not guilty unless you get caught right? Right-O.

My nose is doing fine, the kids are great, life is peachy. This is my last day of Spring break, after the weekend it's back to the grind. I shall bloggeth more later. This is Kelie, over and out.

1.) Using band names, spell out your name:
KMFDM
Electric Light Orchestra
LaRue
Inxs
Everything But the Girl

2) Have you ever had a song written about you? no
3) What song makes you cry? Is There Anybody Out There? - Burlap To Cashmere
4) What song makes you happy? Come on Eileen
5) What do you like to listen to before bed? The crazy thoughts running through my head
6) Name a song by Coal Chamber: Big Truck
7) Who was/were your idol/s when you were younger? Elvis Presley-already deceased
8) First album you ever bought? Alanis Morrissette-Jagged Little Pill
9.)name a song that reminds you of someone and why: I Will Remember You-Sarah McLachlan-reminds me of great grandma, played about 20 times on the radio the day she died.
10) Where would you like to be right now more than ever? Out of this hell

a p p e a r a n c e
HEIGHT: 5'3 1/2"
HAIR COLOR: Kinda skunky now with roots
SKIN COLOR: pale
EYE COLOR: hazel
PIERCINGS: tragus, nipples, YES I SAID NIPPLES!! NO YOU CAN'T SEE!! And the newly added NOSE!
TATTOOS: 4, all lame and laser-worthy.

r i g h t n o w
WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?: dark blue jeans
WHAT SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO?: Barenaked Ladies
WHAT TASTE IS IN YOUR MOUTH?: cheddar cheese
WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE?: Dusky and chilly
HOW ARE YOU?: in a daze, not doing so hot.

d o y o u
GET MOTION SICKNESS?: sometimes
HAVE A BAD HABIT?: I pick my nose on webcam, SURE you can watch
GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS?: Yes, but I have bitter feelings toward my father at this time
LIKE TO DRIVE?:yes, especially on a warm night with the windows down.

f a v o r i t e s
TV SHOW: I never watched TV much, but since my sister's been here Ive watched the OC a couple times.
CONDITIONER: Suave Strawberries and creme
BOOK: Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt
MAGAZINE: Rolling Stone
nonALCOHOLIC DRINK: Water
THING TO DO ON THE WEEKEND: See those I care about
BAND OR GROUP or SINGER or RAPPER: Fav band of all time is Skunk Anansie, or TchKung, it's a toss up.

h a v e y o u
BROKEN THE LAW: yes, just got my first ticket a couple weeks ago, HA!
RAN AWAY FROM HOME: yes, when i was 14
SNUCK OUT OF THE HOUSE: yes
EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING: no, i would rather slit my throat with a rusty spoon.
MADE A PRANK PHONE CALL: yeah
EVER TIPPED OVER A PORTA POTTY: no, ew
USED YOUR PARENTS' CREDIT CARD BEFORE: no
SKIPPED SCHOOL BEFORE: DUH
FELL ASLEEP IN THE SHOWER/BATH: yes
LET A FRIEND CRY ON YOUR SHOULDER: yes

l o v e
CURRENT CRUSH: I'm not a player, I just crush a lot.
BEEN IN LOVE?: I am unsure about that, waiting to finally figure out what Love REALLY feels like.
HAD A HARD TIME GETTING OVER SOMEONE: I havn't even started to try to get over it
BEEN HURT?: abso-frickin-lutely
YOUR GREATEST REGRET: Ever meeting HIM

r a n d o m
DO YOU HAVE A JOB: no
YOUR CD PLAYER HAS IN IT RIGHT NOW: CD's I stole from the internet, currently playing Brian Wilson
IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?: black
WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?: Food in general
WHO MAKES YOU THE HAPPIEST? really good chocolate
WHAT'S THE NEXT CD YOU'RE GONNA GET?: I would love to buy everything I can find from Sigur Ros
WHO DO YOU CONSIDER GOOD FRIENDS?: Erica, Ian, all the speech team people,
WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO?: Hang out with above friends, play pool, sing, dance, be stupid, play my flute, paint, draw with my charcoals.

w h e n / w h a t w a s t h e l a s t
TIME YOU CRIED?: This morning listening to Dandelions by Five Iron Frenzy
YOU GOT A REAL LETTER?: it's been a real long time
YOU GOT E-MAIL: today, it was pretty bad news, made me pretty sad too.
THING YOU PURCHASED: McDonalds chicken nuggets
TV PROGRAM YOU WATCHED: The OC
MOVIE YOU SAW AT THE THEATER: Win a Date with Tad Hamilton

So, I got my nose pierced yesterday. I thought I really really really wanted it. Now I am afraid I look either ghetto or white-trash. It's small, just a tiny silver stud, but still....I just don't know. I wish we could post pictures in here. I suppose I could take a picture of it and link you to my photo album, but that takes effort, and I just don't feel like putting forth any today. Maybe soon, bug me about it and I will.

I downloaded a bunch of songs from my pre-teen years last night too. Thanks to Ian, he helped me remember some, Like warren G- Regulate. That song was hot at that time, I remember loving it back then. I think My music downloading problem has gotten a bit out of hand, I've got thousands of songs on my computer and I am half expecting the RIAA to take my ass down any day now. I don't care if they sue me, fine me, whatever, just don't take my PC!!! That's my umbilical cord, without it, I perish. Sad, but true. Do they have computer addiction therapy? Internet addicts anonymous? Maybe I should organize one. I KNOW! I can start an on-line forum for internet addicts...but that would totally defeat the purpose, but it would be fun right?!

My blog entries are getting silly because I no longer have anything intelligent to say. As if I said intelligent things before, HA. I just thought of a great excuse. It's spring break, and since I couldn't afford to go anywhere I am on a mental vacation. I blog in spurts, some days I only blog because It's an obligatory thing, other days I am bursting at the seams with interesting things to say. Today is an obligatory blogging day. I don't want any gaps in my journal so I am just filling up space with inane babble. I am more interested in reading other people's blogs now than anything else. I am up to about 15 that I read on a daily basis.

I had this amazing story I wanted to blog about, it is so hilarious, but very sexual in nature and due to the demographics of those who faithfully read my blog, I regret to inform you that I won't be able to share it. If you see me around, at RCC or anywhere else..ask me, and I will tell you. But I have to change names to protect the guilty. The story involves two people 'parking', and getting caught up. I am still extremely tickled by it, and I am smiling as I type this.

OK, enough about that already. I don't want to give too much away.

Today was a bit stressful. That's putting it extremely lightly.

First of all, I am on my semi-annual period. I thought I'd share that. It makes me mean. Vicious even. Vindictive. On top of my normal 'tude, I have even more bitchiness and snobbishness in my voice. I am condescending to everyone, and I treat everyone as if they were inferior when they ask me a question. I realize I do this, but usually after the fact. I hate feeling like this, and I really hate being mean to everyone, but I honestly can't help it. I have serious PMS. I probably need some kind of drug for this, but I don't care enough. Me and my sister have been at eachothers throats, it feels like living at Mom and Dad's house again, except now it's MY house, and back then we were disrespectful to them, this time she's being disrespectful to me, and me to her. I blame the IUD's we both got last year. We've never been this bitchy.

Second, my nephew, the cute little darling, has this major problem with the fact that my son exists. The mere presence of my son causes him to go at him, fists flying. They are only 4 months apart in age. My son has an extremely sweet demeanor. He is very laid back, and rarely fusses. He's like me, the thing that makes him the most upset is food. My nephew, he's pretty laid back too. He and my daughter get along just swell. There is just something about my sweet boy that infuriates him. I have no idea. I am forced to believe that there is some unspoken baby code, and my son is using it to get under his skin. Well anyways, today all three kids were huddled around my sisters guitar. It was lying on the floor and they were all picking at the strings and giggling happily. Next thing we know, my son (Bubba) is screaming, and there is a big bite mark on his hand. Later, in the same spot on the floor, Devilyn and Bubba were playing and Bubba started screaming. Now, none of us witnessed the fight, but after the dust cleared we saw my son with blood coming out of his eye. We all assumed Devie had scratched him or something but we really have no idea what happened. There was a hairbrush lying on the floor near them, that is one possibility. Anyways, Bubba had blood gooshing from his eye and I thought it best just to take him to the ER. He has several scrapes around the eye in general, and the eyeball itself was scratched pretty badly too. There wasn't much they could do, but give us antibiotic eye ointment and Tylenol and send us on our merry way.

Tonight, we were bored, so my sister and her hubby and my nephew and I all went to Steak n' Shake in Mt. Zion. I usually LOVE the Mt Zion one, but tonight, the service was terrible. First of all, the only table in smoking that was open was filthy. Then we sat there for 20 minutes before the chick even came over to take our drink order, and we just ordered our food at the same time. We ordered milkshakes and our food. Our food came, and the milkshakes never showed up. We could never seem to catch our server's attention either to ask about the problem. It turns out she was off, and another server was taking her place. He had no idea we had even ordered milkshakes. He was serving us at turtle speed as well. He kinda looked like a fat Vin Diesel. I completely stiffed them. I don't often do that, but I was so royally pissed that I couldn't even bring myself to even rudely leave pennies behind.

I need a good massage. I need to rid my body of the evil toxins being built up by all this stress. I think the main reason I have been sick so much over the past 6 months is stress. I need a nice guy to come give me this massage. I don't want to have to pay for it because there has got to be some eligible bachelor who is willing to rub me free of charge right?

Fight Club!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

Ok, it's not Pokky, it's Pocky. And I am obsessed with it again. I had it as a child when my parents took a 3 week trip to Korea and Japan and brought us back all sorts of goodies. Saturday night when we were in Champaign we saw it at Sam Goody and we got some, and it's all I can think of ever since. I have researched the history of Pocky as well as the bazillions of flavors. I NEED to find a store in Decatur that sells POCKY!!!! POCKY POCKY POCKY!!! I have discovered a site that shows the many different kinds of Pocky, and it has pictures. I have made them my wallpaper on my PC. So long Evanescence, you have been replaced by a small stick dipped in chocolate, that is better than sex and raises my seratonin level to post-orgasmic bliss! Everyone should try Pocky!
I've got nothing to say beyond that. Good day to you ladies and gents. http://www.alde.com/anime/pocky1.html

Last night was a doozy. Erica, Ian, Mike H. and myself went to Champaign to the mall and out to eat. It was a blast...In my opinion anyways, I had a ton of fun, I don't know if everyone else did. We ate at Fazoli's which is THE best fast food Italian restaurant chain in the world. Wait..I can't think of any other Italian restaurant chains. Regardless, it is fantastic, I suggest everyone run out to the nearest Fazoli's and gorge on breadsticks and Alfredo. On the way home we listened to 80's new wave, and ate Pokky,and let me tell you, that stuff is natural Prozac because by the time we got back to Decatur my cheeks hurt from smiling so much. When Mike got Erica and I back to my house (her car was parked here) I guess he had a sudden epiphany that Steak n' Shake is the place to be on Saturday night, and we hopped back in his monster Lincoln (sans Erica-parental issues, I'd rather not comment at this time) and headed over there. Some extremely weird guy, apparently named "Spider" was talking to Ian and the dude just totally creeped me out. He had a bunch of nasty tattoos and was obviously obliterated on whatever his drug of choice was. He was talking to me, rather rudely in my opinion, and I didn't know how to talk to this person. I just kind of smiled and nodded, but copped a small 'tude, as is my usual defense mechanism. And thanks guys, Ian and Mike, NO HELP AT ALL. Just sat there...Didn't they know they were supposed to save me??? *sighs* Men. Do they know anything??? When I got home, at 1 or 2, I don't really remember, STEVE of all people calls and proceeds to bitch at me non-stop until I finally just tell him I am hanging up, and do so. I don't know what his problem is...actually, I do know what his problem is, and in my opinion, I think it's stupid. So yeah, that's a recap. I'll try and update more frequently, I know, I know, we always say that. I mean it this time by George. No one ever makes it this far into my entries anyways, so I could literally say anything here and no one would care. Shishkabob-a-bob-bob, Shaza-gob-a-moo-moo, yora-gora-stink-blink, jiggla sniggla. That last sentence is a real sentence I swear to you. It is a memory etched into my brain since childhood from a "Highlights" magazine for kids. It was a story called Jiggla Sniggla, where this kid has something happen to him and he can't remember how to speak English and all he can say is that sentence up there ^. I will never forget that story, and I have no idea why, because I must have been 6 or 7 when I first heard it. Ok, I feel better now, I'm done.

You are Missing.

This song is basically impossible to find without
some annoying whirl or bleep sound in it.
Still, from what you can hear this song is
amazing. So amazing that it remains on my
playlist and I stomach the annoyances because
of the pure fact that this song is worth it

Your Lyrics:

Please please forgive me
But I won't be home again
Maybe someday you'll look up
And barely conscious you'll say to no one
Isn't something missing

You want to cry for my absence I know
You forgot me long ago
Am I that unimportant
Am I so insignificant
Isn't someone missing me

Even though I'm the sacrifice
You wont try for me not now
Though I'd die to know you love me
I'm all alone
Isn't someone missing me

Please please forgive me
But I won't be home again
I know what you do to yourself
I breathe deep and cry out
Isn't something missing

Even though I'm the sacrifice
You wont try for me not now
Though I'd die to know you love me
I'm all alone
Isn't someone missing me

And if I bleed, I'll bleed,
Knowing you don't care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
And wake without you there,
Isn't something missing?
Isn't something...



What Extremely Underrated Evanescence song are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Taking Over

Your lyrics

You don't remember me,
But I remember you.
I lie awake and try so hard,
Not to think of you.
But who (who) can (can) decide,
What they dream ?
And dream I do...
I believe in you.
I'll give up everything just to find you.
I have to be with you, to live, to breathe,
You're taking over me.
Have you forgotten all I know,
And all we had ?
You saw me mourning my love for you,
And touched my hand.
I knew you loved me then.
I believe in you.
I'll give up everything just to find you.
I have to be with you, to live, to breathe,
You're taking over me.
I look in the mirror and see your face.
If I look deep enough.
So many things inside that are just like you are
taking over.
I believe in you.
I'll give up everything just to find you.
I have to be with you, to live, to breathe,
You're taking over me.
I believe in you.
I'll give up everything just to find you.
I have to be with you, to live, to breathe,
You're taking over me,
(You're taking over me),
You're taking over me,
(Taking over me), Taking over me.


What Evanescence song are you?
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I do realize that posting a giant picture of Hitler in my blog is extremely controversial, and I do apologize for anyone who was offended by it. I am not taking it off though. This is MY blog, if you don't like it, leave. Freedom of speech yadda yadda yadda. Ok. I feel purged of those feelings now and I can move forward in this blogging experience. Ahem. Today sucks. Yesterday was cool. Ian, Erica and Mike (not hagan) came over and we hung out and had fun. Ian makes the most hilarious guitar faces ever. I don't have much to say today. I am feeling happy...and I don't know why. I'm not gonna argue though. I'll just let it be, go with the flow man, yeah..it's all gravy baby.

You are the grammar Fuhrer. All bow to your
authority. You will crush all the inferior
people under the soles of your jackboots, and
any who question your motives will be
eliminated. Your punishment is being the bane
of every other person's existence, because
you're constantly contradicting stupidity.
Everyone will be gunning for you. Your dreams
of a master race of spellers and grammarians
frighten the masses. You must always watch your
back. If only your power could be used for good
instead of evil.


What is your grammar aptitude?
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I have little Princess Lea (sp?) buns in my hair today. I am feeling childlike. The childlike Empress. I miss that movie....that was one of my favorites as a kid. I always thought the Luck Dragon looked like a big white dog, and it made me laugh a lot. And not to mention, Atreyu (sp?) was forkin-A hot. My nephew decided that his cereal would be far more tasty if he dumped it on his lap a few minutes ago. I don't think his Mommy is very happy right now. Little kids are so great, they have no sense of reality yet, they are so innocent. In his mind, dumping his cereal over was probably a really fun thing to do, especially since you can make some wicked milk finger paintings on the table and floor, at least, that's what my kids do. One time Hollie snuck a small glob of hot pink playdough back into her room and proceeded to smear it in very thin layers all over the walls. Let me tell you, dried hot pink playdough is like liquid nails. That stuff would NOT come off. I had to chip at it, and it took off some paint as well. Her entire room is painted in hot pink paint scribbles anyways...But she seemed to have gotten it on every piece of white trim she could reach with her little devil hands. Sometimes...Motherhood gets so overwhelming that you want to scream. It always redeems itself, and there is nothing more precious than sweet little baby kisses that leave slobber all over your face. Or when your child finally is old enough to be able to say "I love you" back. Even though it sounds like "A wad doo", it still melts your heart. Hollie will be 3 years old on the 16th of this month, and this totally wigs me out. I don't feel like I am old enough to have a 3 year old...I'm still 14 right??? Oh man, I'm 21 already. Weirdness. My son is approaching a year and a half....A whole year and a half since I was pregnant...And scared to death lying on an operating room bed, waiting for a surgeon to slice me open and pull my child out into the world. My Mam was so right, time does fly, and I know the next time I blink Hollie and Bubba will be saying "see ya" and heading out the door. I have the song "Paper Bag" by Fiona Apple stuck in my head for some reason. I will leave you with my favorite part...
"Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love."

Good morning folks. I don't have a lot to say today, which is a miracle. No mile long blog for you to read today. I spent half of my study time last night reading the blogs of those whom I have never met. And a couple of people from school...Mike, I am disappointed...There has been no new entry for some time now, tsk tsk. One persons blog had me rolling, it was a link from Mikes blog. I feel weird about reading blogs of RCC students still...I just can't get over the peeping tom feeling. I want to say something to them, "hey, I read your blog, it was amazing!", but I don't for fear they will think I am a psycho-stalker. The only person I openly admit to stalking is Mike. I am sure he is well aware of it by now. So, I have to talk about speech team now...It's just standard in my blog these days. I have to come up with 3 new events for Nationals, but I have to have them ready by regionals and that happens to be 3 or so weeks away. So, I am panicking. My spring break will be spent begging both Mike's for help I am sure. I have 2 major tests this week too, and it blows chunks. Nationals is in California.....We go April 11th I believe. I am super freakin' excited about it. And scared poop-less. That's all I've got to say about that. Good day to you. Just as an end note...as I spell checked this entry...it said the word "freakin'" was wrong, and suggested foreskin instead...I am dying laughing.