I've got much to blog about today, but I will try to keep it simple. I had a job interview at Kroger today, it went very very well. I took a saliva drug test in office and she basically said I had the job, but she couldn't not officially confirm it until the test comes back in 2 days. The nose ring has to go, no ifs ands or buts. I am bummed about that. Last night my friends Ian and Bryan came over. We just BS'd and had a good time. I de-haired Ian completely with my surgi-cream spray. It's kind of like Nair but way better and less stinky. So he's a hairless rat now. Bryan is having kind of a crappy home life right now, and he just stayed over, he slept on my couch. While I was gone at my interview today, Phyllis came over with her best friend, wicked witch Diane and proceeded to have a meeting about what a horrible person I am with my sister and my friend Bryan. Then they launched on him, telling him that he is not allowed to spend the night anymore because he is a health hazard to my kids. ????????? I am confused on how he is a health hazard. He seems clean, he washes his hands and he never picks up my kids anyway. Then she went in on Carie about how I allow underage drinking parties at my house, which is COMPLETELY untrue, I don't even drink myself, and I don't allow people to drink over here. I've never even had a party here, just a couple get togethers and there was no partying going on. A few games of Uno and going to IHOP at 5 am are hardly crazy shindigs if you ask me. One person has had a few beers here with Carie and Zeb ONE time. Big whooptidoo.

Then she pulled Carie aside and said that I was just using Bryan for a piece of ass. Her exact words, "That boy in there is just a piece of ass." Carie started laughing because she thought she was joking, but soon realized she was totally serious. She seems to think that I am sleeping with every guy who comes over my house. She was basically trying to present a case to my sister that I am a bad mother. It's not the first time she's pulled a stunt like this, and each and every time we go through this I always ask her to please come to ME if she has a problem, and to not just gossip about it with the family until it gets so blown out of proportion that I blow up on her. So for the 2nd time in the last 7 months, I am wanting to leave or at least move out of *her* house so she can't control me anymore. Carie said that she kept referring to my children as "her babies" and this bothers me a lot. I don't know what to do, but I believe I have several options. I can drop out of school and work at Kroger and try to make it in an apartment here. I can move back home to Alaska. I can move back to Colorado with my sister. Almost every choice involves dropping out of school anyways, because I don't have anyone to watch my kids. I've missed 4 classes this week.

This woman controls every aspect of my life and I am sick of it. I was held prisoner by her little golden-boy grandson for 5 years of my life, and I refuse to live like this anymore. Something has to happen, and soon before I stew about this until I implode. I want to talk to Phyllis one on one, without either of us getting upset, but you just can't talk to this woman. She's always on the defense and she always talks as if you're attacking her, no matter how gently you put things. Also, she is almost never alone with me, she always brings one of her friends when we try to talk so she has back-up if I say anything she doesn't like. It's very difficult living here, and I am tired of the tension and walking on eggshells all the time. I've got to make a move. It's now or never.